Sometimes, we tend to miss silly things. I do that when it rains. Today it rained heavily, though briefly. I missed a lot of things. It reminded me of those times when it would rain for days non stop. Everything would be wet and it was impossible for clothes to dry, to play on terrace, and if you went out you had mud allover clothes.

When i was in school, rainy day was usually my holiday, especially if it was raining heavily. I went to school in a rickshaw, ours was a open one the ones which have 6-8 children, two standing at the and the rest seated. When it rained we would make a dome sort of thing using our umbrellas, such that not a single drop would fall on us. If our shoes got wet, we were allowed to roam with out them in the class and dry our socks on window sill. I for some reason liked doing this. There were only few idiots like me who did this, rest preferred catching cold or having shriveled skin. All the colorful umbrella would fill up the corridor. Another advantage of rain was buses came late, so teachers did not turn in first few periods.

While coming back home, the street would be filled with water uptill knee, due to poor drainage. Though later it was corrected. One had to be careful about the position on ditches to avoid falling. Also, the garbage would become flotsam and once there was a puppy swimming as I waded through the stagnant water. It was an ordeal.

Now, since we have moved to a new place, and it rains very less, I miss these odd things which remind me of childhood. And for some reason I cant stop smiling and feeling good whenever it rains.

p.s don't mind the grammatical errors. I will correct later :)

From hell to the frying pan

It has taken me a lot of time to decide whether to write this post or not. The reason why I did not want to write earlier was that I did not wish to attract sympathy.

I had gone home. I was to come back that day by train. I had done my shopping and had reached the railway station 2 hours ahead of time. The moment I alighted from the metro and entered the station I had the feeling of independence. I felt great about it.

The station was full with people. It was middle of the day. My train was after two hours and I did not even know which platform it was on. So, I waited at the inquiry. I sat by one pillar facing downwards. I heard something weird. As if somebody just said something to me and went past. I looked up and it took me couple of seconds to realize that I was being flashed. Whoa! what a nasty experience. I let it go. But then that person frequented me with lecherous remarks. I had had enough of this guy. So I looked that guy in his eyes, and then walked towards police inspector. After that I did not see the person again.

However the ordeal was not to end there. The inspector guy was of a dubious character. I had to explicitly explain to him twice in words what I saw and heard. And trust me it sounds awful when you say it in hindi. But I was very brave about it did not hesitate for a second. The policeman asked me to follow him. I thought it was for some report and he would ask me how that person looked. But instead that policeman offered me a cup of coffee and tried to chat. He even had the audacity to ask for my phone number. That time all I was thinking was how to get rid of him. But he would not leave my side. Alas, after 1 hour I could get rid of him on the pretext that I needed to catch the train.

Afterward, I reminisced and wondered if one such experience was not enough for the day. I was very happy and felt free and independent when I reached the railway station. And seconds later the whole incident happened. However, I remember that not for a second I felt traumatised or weak because of it. Instead i felt strong and dealt with it in the best possible manner, because I know things like this always happens and that to in the middle of the day. So, if you are girl do not get annoyed or depressed about such things. It is not our fault. Instead be open about it, spread awareness and raise your voice. And I guess that's what I am doing now.

Nostalgic

Less than two months are left and then we will leave this place. Finally I came to regard this place as home and its people as pseudo family. It is natural to feel nostalgic and the fact that I do not have a new place to look forward to in near future makes it even worse.

Many things have changed over the years, specially people have changed a lot. We were fresh, effervescent and naive and matured over the years. (The concept of maturity does not hold on me when it comes to "expression of self". This ability of mine usually lands me in trouble than doing any good. Yesterday I was accidentally in such a troublesome situation.)Even the campus is changing to meet the new demands. And an year later it may not be the same campus we remember.

I will miss the people, my room and laid back life style here. Priya and Tanu have been my best friends since the beginning. I will miss them a lot. And before this post turns to a thanking note, I will put an end to it and rush to department for BTP. This is my last week for BTP and I am trying to put and end to the tiring regime of 7 days a week. (That place is a black hole, regardless of what time I go there I usually can't escape before 10). Once I am done with that, I will try the first thing from my list of "must do things in last days of college".

Personality Development Session
Today, when I saw, that a Personality Development Session (PDS) was about to start in the train, I had a flashback.
It has been almost three year since my first PDS. It was daily, one full hour of humiliation for me and fun for others. I used to hate that month long regime, which made me feel even more homesick. Most of my friends recall that I looked afraid and spoke little.
Last three years, I have wondered, why anybody would rag someone whom they don’t know. Specially someone who, for the first time is away from her family. Why did they not realize that she might be feeling homesick and missing people who cared for her? Why the seniors did not make an attempt to make her feel comfortable, at least in the first week?
Now, when I am in the senior most batch, I have come to understand what most of my seniors must have been going through. Being the senior most batch, you happen to know the least number of people, most of the people you knew have already passed out. A sense of loneliness creeps in. Besides that, after three years of talking about the same people, there is no fun in bitching about them anymore. One needs new people to talk to and gossip about. And if you were in my college you would understand that gossiping is the single most important source of entertainment in the lives of students here. So life without gossip seems a little too mundane. The second plausible reason for promoting PDS is the age old funda of saas bhi kabhi bahu thi…or senior ki bhi kabhi personality development hui thi …
And the PDS continued till the hostels were separated, and to my bad luck we were the last ones with fully developed personalities in our campus.
Well, I am not promoting PDS to revive the so called traditions. I am writing about it because, it left an impact on me and at times when I look back, the memories of that one month are stronger than the rest of the three eventful years.

Rainy Day .....


Well , who doesn't like a shower to beat the scorching heat ,everyone does and so do i. Finally ,Delhi has got its first shower and it has been raining cats and dogs since this morning .Personally, i love rainy season ,it means holiday for me .Since my childhood i don't go to school on a rainy day .i enjoy the rain at home ,looking at it from my huge french window .


but today was an exception ,i had to go for my training .i waited for rain to stop .but it would not . and i saw the other side of rainy season , it made me wish that, it was scorching heat again.the roads with big holes were filled with water .there were many traffic jams .i almost got wet at the bus stand ( but i was carrying an extra pair clothing's). the traffic was slow and the bus was at its stuffed best .i have travelled in stuffed buses before ,but this one was different .i usually get to the middle of the bus .today i was standing on the second step on the gate . i had never stood there in my life .there was just a rod to hang on to .and every passenger in the bus pushed me on the way out .then finally when the bus was empty (that's what the conductor said ) , i could make it to the bonnet of the bus , sandwiched between two stinking aunties !


then by the shear force of the passengers moving as they crossed me , my cell phone fell from my pocket , on the ground ,without me realizing that it had gone .i thought it was gone forever ,but then , i could find its pieces and the battery ,as the stomping passenger bolted out of the bus .


ten minutes later i was out of the bus ,gasping for air .i was an hour late ( now if you know me ,you would know that i don't like being late ) and half drenched looking at the rain and wishing that it was a clear sky !!

Making a place .....


What do you do ,when you are surrounded by hundreds of people who are just like you ,same aspirations ,same ideas ,same fear and same insecurities ?
How do you make your face remembered in a crowd of similar looking faces?what do you do ,when you have been living under the notion that ,there are very few like you ,and then one fine day you reach a place were everbody besides their outer cover ,is essentially like you from within .your notion breaks .And whatever you had been thinking about yourself changes in a matter of time .and then you face an identity crisis .You meet people who are better than you wherever you go .You find that there is a lot of competition ,not only with the people around you but also with yourself and then there begins a struggle to make a place for yourself .During this struggle you truly discovers a whole new perspective of viewing the things the way they are and the way they ought to be.